[Audio]

[moveslikestrider]

ugh shit my head feels like it got smashed up against a couple of walls
if this is what a hangover feels like that noise can skip right off somewhere
i dont even care where just somewhere??
ahahaha that was not a witty sentence at all
f minus for dave strider and his attempts to sort himself out
speaking of that why does it feel like im in a vice thats
[There's a rustling sound from the gear followed by a sharp inhale of breath.]
is this for real seriously
i cant even decide what to think about this because im not getting enough air in this two sizes too small shirt get up
i mean it makes my ass look incredible
this is so stupid i cant even lift a leg without my pants threatening to give up the ghost
who the hell decided to shrink my sweet gear thats just a traversity
well its not exactly sweet its something out of a renaissance fair
how the fuck am i going to get out of this stuff its pasted onto me like glue
who the hell would do that though that just seems dumber than spending all this time remarking about this
[There's a growl that echoes before Dave keeps going.]
what oh hey
i remember you
feels like its been a year since we shared the sky together and went darting around like we lost our minds
why did i give you shades that just seems so dumb in retrospect like trying to pay homage to something when the real deal is around
but between you and me this doesnt feel like my life anymore
i couldnt really believe it when i had it because its so picture perfect straight out of some fantasy a lonely guy might have

--RRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-- wait what the fuck?

[Dave's soliloquy about his ill-fitting clothes is brought to an abrupt halt by the tail end of a very loud, very aggravated shout. It might be hard to tell exactly who the voice belongs to at first, since it can be a little difficult to judge nonsensical yelling. But once he starts speaking, it becomes clear that the voice belongs to John Egbert.]

Where the hell am I? [A slight pause, during which time we can only assume that John takes survey of his surroundings and discovers...] DAVE!!!! Oh my god, it's great to finally see you again! Wherever here is!

[There's an array of vague bumping, stumbling, and rustling noises that we're going to assume is John getting out of his own bed and moving over to Dave's. Because that's exactly what it is. Unfortunately, he still doesn't seem to have remembered how to use his indoor voice because he's still kind of yelling.]

I missed you so mu-- where are my sweet god tier pajamas? What the hell is this, it doesn't even fit!!!

[There's a sound almost like laughter but it's a bit muffled.]
ok ok lets remember not to bellow like some beast
were in a hospital here
what if you woke some poor old lady or something

Why are we in a hospital...?

[It's quieter, but...ultimately, not enough. Because before Dave gets the chance to answer another growl can be heard, but it's decidedly not of the Pokemon race.]

Jesus fucking Christ will the two of you SHUT THE FUCK UP?!

[It sounds like something fluffy and soft hit at least one of them at a rather high velocity followed by a second one and then more from the now recognizable voice of Rose Lalonde.]

I swear to god neither of you know how the fuck to be quiet do you? Is that a hard concept? I thought not but apparently you both still know how to surprise me! Jesus fuck my head feels like it's splitting open ugh. Fucking asinine Skaia-vexing addlepates I swear to GOD.

[ooc: Translation with no colors: here.]

Comments

video;

[papshooshing]

You guys are absolutely shithive maggots.

video;

[moveslikestrider]

[Dave is lankier than before, which should be familiar. He's all long limbs and messy hair...with clothes that are way too tight. He raises an eyebrow.]

Yet you talk to me anyway. Looks like I'm caught up, bro.

video;

[papshooshing]

[ very familiar. like right familiar. Karkat isn't going to comment on the tightness of the clothing. maybe just discretely slip in a few $$$ into Dave's account later. yeap. ]

If you'd like it better, I could just refrain from speaking to you entirely.

[ after a pause and is that relief? yeah, that's definitely relief. ]

About fucking time too. I wallow enough in my failures as is. Didn't really need to relive some of that embarrassment here, thanks.

video;

[moveslikestrider]

[So long as you don't slip those $$$ into his pants, everything is gold.

Magical shit all up in here.]

Pfft, no. You can ping me whenever. We're bros and that means I'm always on call.

[He stretches one leg out and winces, popping off his shoe because damn it.]

Speaking of living, I feel like I could eat a whole Burger King, shitty window ads and all.

video;

[papshooshing]

[ yeah, see, that's not likely to happen. Karkat wouldn't know what that means anyway. and if the "moves like strider" includes a pole and the loss of clothing, then Karkat is likely to NOPE right out of there. ]

First order of business is re-obtaining some walkie talkies. I know you'll mourn the loss of the crab communicator, but alas. Sacrifices have to be made here.

[ but don't comment on the chair. B| ]

Feeling that sort of ravaging hunger is completely normal. I also find that a double bacon cheeseburger is the perfect cure for it.

video;

[moveslikestrider]

Hahaha, ok, ok. I was thinking two pizzas first then moving to the burgers. And fries. I didn't realize how magical they were. Like, perfect finger food besides nacho chips.

[He starts to grin a bit at the mention of walkie-talkies.] What, you haven't already gotten a pair? I'm touched you waited for me. It's all warm in my feels cavity.

video;

[papshooshing]

How could you not notice the magical properties of fries? I think that's the one food humans did right. You know, besides putting bacon on shit. You can't possibly go wrong with putting bacon on something.

[ ROLLING EYES INTO FOREVER DAVE. ]

Now tell me, Dave, if I were to have come to you previously with a walkie-talkie you wouldn't you have stared at me like I lost my think pan? It would have lost all meaning to it.

video;

[moveslikestrider]

I didn't mean offer me that precious gift before. Just to wait, wait until the day I could understand. Anyway, picked out the brand and everything yet?

[He just laughs, shaking his head a bit.] There are somethings you can go wrong on with bacon. The double bacon cheeseburger is so not one of those terrible travesties.

video;

[papshooshing]

I was kind of hoping we could do that together, Dave.

[ das gay, Karkat. stahp. ]

video;

[tentacletrainer]

What else is new?

video;

[papshooshing]

Are, uh...

Are you caught up too?

video; private;

[tentacletrainer]

[[How to answer that. Quietly filtering this because how does deal with Kanay right now.]]

...more than I'd like to be right now.

video; private;

[papshooshing]

For what it's worth... I kind of prefer the you that's been here over the sopor version.

But if you'd like to talk about it, I'm around.

video; private;

[tentacletrainer]

Ugh, right now? Me too. My head is killing me right now and all I can think is "What the fuck was wrong with me?"

video; private;

[papshooshing]

First of all, listen to me right now when I say this: There is nothing wrong with you. Considering all of the shit that's happened to us in the last three years, I think we've managed to handle it well enough. Think about it, Rose... We've had no guidance whatsoever and we're all still just bulgefondling adolescents. When I think of us now? I'd say we did pretty damn good thus far.

I just think we all have different ways of dealing with our garbage and maybe not in the best of ways. Terezi guzzled all of that nasty ass drink and delved into her black romance instead of just dealing with her crap. Dave talks. And talks. And motherfucking talks into oblivion.

Me? Well we all know what I do. It's not really great either.

So really all we've got to do is learn from those mistakes, right? Isn't that what growing up and all of that's all about - making mistakes and learning from them?

video; private;

[tentacletrainer]

[[She's quiet for a while after that, obviously thinking over what he said.]]

...yeah. Yeah, you're right. Just...god this hurts. Regretting past Rose's choices hard right now.

...thanks.

video; private;

[papshooshing]

I regret many of my past decisions. It only causes migraines so I would suggest not thinking about it too hard.

And you're welcome. Not that you needed to thank me for speaking my mind in the first place.

video;

[ghostytrainer]

Karkat why are you hu-- wait never mind forget I started to ask that. I guess I just remembered that I already know the answer or something.

[He looks pretty damn annoyed right now, though it doesn't seem to be directed at Karkat.]

But no, I am not shithive maggots. Do you want to know who is though? Who is really shithive maggots? Vriska. Vriska is shithive maggots. Like goddamn... I knew she was kind of crazy but...

[Things that we never thought we'd ever hear John say.]

video;

[papshooshing]

[ owlish blinking. John... John just what the fuck, dude. ]

Egbert. I fucking told you she was. It's all about her and her irons. She'll do whatever the flippity hell she wants just to come out on top.

video;

[ghostytrainer]

Well yeah and now I feel really stupid because you and Dave both told me this but I guess I never realized just how crazy and dangerous she actually was? Like... just. Jesus.

[A revelation was had.]

The weirdest thing is is that like... for some reason this is hitting me harder now than it did when it actually happened? I'm not sure why but I figure in like half an hour or something it'll suddenly make sense because I guess that's just how things are working as far as my memory is concerned right now.

video;

[papshooshing]

...Yeah. Maybe it's for the best that you don't exactly remember?

video;

[ghostytrainer]

Well that sure wasn't cryptic at all. Nope, does not require any further delving into whatsoever, we are just going to ignore it and move on!

So how are you, Karkat? Man, it feels like I haven't talked to you in forever but I'm going to assume that that isn't actually the case. Anything exciting happen during my apparently week-long siesta that I didn't plan on taking?

video;

[papshooshing]

No, not really. It's kind of been the same shit over and over again. Rinse and repeat, tingles in the scalp and all.

video;

[ghostytrainer]

Oh fun. Oh, hey! I just realized... I am all caught up to you now, aren't I? Maybe? Hell, not just you but everybody hahaha! Though apparently I passed Aradia, because she doesn't remember meeting me in the dreambubbles.

...I used to be the furthest behind, didn't I? Hehehe, this is actually kinda funny.

video;

[papshooshing]

All I can say is that it's about damn time. It was extremely annoying for you to not be aware of all of the shit that's hit the whirling device.

Not to mention, seeing how things were here upon arrival was just weird and you all kept acting like I was the one that was out of my goddamn think pan.