moveslikestrider

ugh shit my head feels like it got smashed up against a couple of walls
if this is what a hangover feels like that noise can skip right off somewhere
i dont even care where just somewhere??
ahahaha that was not a witty sentence at all
f minus for dave strider and his attempts to sort himself out
speaking of that why does it feel like im in a vice thats
[There's a rustling sound from the gear followed by a sharp inhale of breath.]
is this for real seriously
i cant even decide what to think about this because im not getting enough air in this two sizes too small shirt get up
i mean it makes my ass look incredible
this is so stupid i cant even lift a leg without my pants threatening to give up the ghost
who the hell decided to shrink my sweet gear thats just a traversity
well its not exactly sweet its something out of a renaissance fair
how the fuck am i going to get out of this stuff its pasted onto me like glue
who the hell would do that though that just seems dumber than spending all this time remarking about this
[There's a growl that echoes before Dave keeps going.]
what oh hey
i remember you
feels like its been a year since we shared the sky together and went darting around like we lost our minds
why did i give you shades that just seems so dumb in retrospect like trying to pay homage to something when the real deal is around
but between you and me this doesnt feel like my life anymore
i couldnt really believe it when i had it because its so picture perfect straight out of some fantasy a lonely guy might have

--RRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-- wait what the fuck?

[Dave's soliloquy about his ill-fitting clothes is brought to an abrupt halt by the tail end of a very loud, very aggravated shout. It might be hard to tell exactly who the voice belongs to at first, since it can be a little difficult to judge nonsensical yelling. But once he starts speaking, it becomes clear that the voice belongs to John Egbert.]

Where the hell am I? [A slight pause, during which time we can only assume that John takes survey of his surroundings and discovers...] DAVE!!!! Oh my god, it's great to finally see you again! Wherever here is!

[There's an array of vague bumping, stumbling, and rustling noises that we're going to assume is John getting out of his own bed and moving over to Dave's. Because that's exactly what it is. Unfortunately, he still doesn't seem to have remembered how to use his indoor voice because he's still kind of yelling.]

I missed you so mu-- where are my sweet god tier pajamas? What the hell is this, it doesn't even fit!!!

[There's a sound almost like laughter but it's a bit muffled.]
ok ok lets remember not to bellow like some beast
were in a hospital here
what if you woke some poor old lady or something

Why are we in a hospital...?

[It's quieter, but...ultimately, not enough. Because before Dave gets the chance to answer another growl can be heard, but it's decidedly not of the Pokemon race.]

Jesus fucking Christ will the two of you SHUT THE FUCK UP?!

[It sounds like something fluffy and soft hit at least one of them at a rather high velocity followed by a second one and then more from the now recognizable voice of Rose Lalonde.]

I swear to god neither of you know how the fuck to be quiet do you? Is that a hard concept? I thought not but apparently you both still know how to surprise me! Jesus fuck my head feels like it's splitting open ugh. Fucking asinine Skaia-vexing addlepates I swear to GOD.

[ooc: Translation with no colors: here.]

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Wait what, seriously? Terezi's gone?

[Nobody had told him this yet!!!]

Err... not that I even knew she was here until just now but damn... that sucks!

Rose, I think maybe you should save that aspirin for later, yeah? [He sounds, and looks, a little worried. He just doesn't want Rose OD'ing or anything like that, that would be bad.]

Thanks, Ms. Lalonde.

[He hasn't moved towards the bagels or anything just yet, seeming to be in favor of waiting to be sure that Rose doesn't pop any more pills first.]

[Kanaya isn't quite sure whether she is happy or sad about Rose's memories, but she's certainly not going to voice that.]

Well.

On a less disturbing and perhaps somewhat more entertaining tangent, are you suffering from the same wardrobe problems as your brother?

[She ruffles Dave's hair affectionately and walks over to hand Rose the sunglasses. Mom also makes a point to ruffle John's hair with as much affection when she passes him.]

No problem! I've had too much experience with hangovers before.

[Mom sits down on an unoccupied bed, crossing one leg over the other.]

So, you three mind telling me what happened? I assume this was one of those comas in which you experienced whatever was going on in our universe.

[[She chuckles a little.]]

Yes, I am, but unlike Dave I simply took my clothes off. The blanket is enough to cover me for now.

Urgh... normally I could probably answer that for you because I have been here for two years but as it stands right now, I kind of feel like a newbie myself. My memories are all borked up for whatever reason. I think it's because I just skipped three years, but two of those years were technically sort of repeat years since I was here and fuck if I actually know what's going on.

[It'll all make sense in a little bit, but not right now.]

If you read the guides though, you are probably good on the big, important stuff.

...

[Do you hear that awkward, embarrassed silence, Rose? That is your fault because you do not tell girls with huge crushes and distant otheruniverse relationships with you about being naked in bed!]

R-right. Ah. What...what I meant to indicate was that...

[A breath. Okay. Collect yourself, Kanaya.]

You...will require a new wardrobe. And alterations to your current one.

I will, you're right. [[If you can't hear the smile in her voice Kanaya, you're deaf.]]

You wouldn't happen to be proposing something, would you?

I might just be doing something akin to that, yes.

Assuming you would be amiable to the concept, at least.

I would never turn such an offer down from you, Kanaya. I would have to be crazy. I don't have my new measurements though.

[ John's life, man. ]

I've yet to be the target of her trident! But even if I were, I could probably manage it. I have time on my side, normally! Well, I also think she sort of just doesn't like Megidos? Or rather she finds my dancestor unsettling, which is sort of understandable. But I think they're friends! Although there was mutual killing and stuff.

[ Moving on is always fine with her, though! ]

Oh! Just the usual things. Of my pokemon, and a flower whose name I didn't now, so I was wondering if you knew it? There aren't any ruins around this area, sadly! I wish there were, that would make it so much more fun!

Apparently I told him I thought it would be interesting to see what happened when everything blew up!

I don't see how that's unsettling.

[ ...

well she doesn't. ]

I...am very relieved to hear that.

Well, your mother is there, yes? You can have her take them when you are away from your associates, and then let me know what they are.

And then you can send me what clothing you hope to salvage and I can attempt to adjust it.

Ah, you're right! I hadn't even thought of that. I'll be sure to do that. I don't know if I have anything salvageable...

Well, we won't know until we try.

And I'd like to think I have something of a special talent to this particular subject.

So if you were sleeping, how come you're hungover? Were you drunk before your coma, or were you dream-drinking?

[Important question obvs.]

Uh- I dunno?

[Shutting up again, he listens to what John has to say.]

Sorta like a genjutsu then? Ninja use them a lot at home, you can put people under an illusion and everything looks and feels real to them, even though its not. Is that what you're saying its like?

No, not really. It's kind of been the same shit over and over again. Rinse and repeat, tingles in the scalp and all.

I was kind of hoping we could do that together, Dave.

[ das gay, Karkat. stahp. ]

...Yeah, okay, that is pretty hilarious in retrospect. Though at the time I could not believe he was having an actual tantrum.

Awesome.

--Oh! Speaking of, did I leave any Pokemon behind? Aradia told me that I was apparently here before? I hope they don't think I abandoned them on purpose.

...[It wasn't that funny at all, kind of stupid really.]

[John are you losing your edge as Mister Funnyman.]

I arrived on the 17th of June and took the ferry on Aradia's suggestion to Kanto. That trip took three days, so all in all I've been here about four days now.

Well, I heard mention of a hospital, and you all seemed out of sorts...

[ She trails off into a laugh. ]

You must be pretty good friends, right?

Please don't worry about it, especially if it's getting you all...confused. I'm more than capable of figuring it out - and anyway, Dave - I think? - explained it to me, at least...I think that was an explanation.

I know it's not anything to worry about, at least.

[ SO, THERE'S THAT. ]

I did read the guides! They were really...informative. Truly. I don't know that any guide could really get across everything when it's trying to teach you all about a new world, though.

Maybe you could post to the news asking about it. [He actually...lights up a bit. This is dead things territory.] I mean there has to be someone out there doing it. If the professors know, maybe we could go see them. Learn how they're doing it and maybe go root for fossils too. Bring them to this person and go hey, bring them to life.

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